April Fools

Every year since I started blogging, I've toyed with the idea of an April Fools post. Every year I've had an idea, but resisted the urge, probably due to some unusual (and providential) moment when I hit the self-edit button.

This year I just can't resist, though I hope to be provocative without being obnoxious. So I offer you this question: If you saw one of the below statements, posted on April 1st, which would you most easily believe to be true and why? Which is the most unthinkable and why? Which would you be most pleased to see occur? Which would best serve the cause of the gospel?

1. [Pick-your-favorite-summer-camp] stops trading in come-forward invitations.
2. John MacArthur appears on BJU's Bible Conference schedule.
3. The Fundamental Baptist Fellowship releases a resolution rebuking the too infrequent presence of expositional preaching and church discipline in fundamentalist churches.
4. Southern Baptist Theological Seminary renames the Billy Graham School of Missions and Evangelism.
5. A book written a self-identified separatist fundamentalist is given away in a gift bag to all Shepherd's Conference attendees. (Yah, I know, that already happened.)
   
6. The Leadership Conference hosted by Calvary Baptist Theological Seminary in Lansdale, Pennsylvania, incorporates a 9Marks regional workshop into its program.
7. A significant fundamentalist institution admits and apologizes that its past policies were rooted more in latent racism than religious conviction.
8. Someone hosts a theology-centered youth ministry training conference with both fundamentalists and someone from the MacArthur orbit . . . and none of the speakers cancel.
9. Together for the Gospel incorporates Dave Doran's proposed article in its affirmations and denials.
   
10. The author of this blog admits it's all been a colossal waste of time and shuts down the operation.
    

I'm still thinking about my own answers. Perhaps I'll post them in a day or two.